I am quite sure there’s a acknowledged mental condition where the sufferer believes that he or she is really a fictional character, living inside a novel, as well as subject to the whims of the author. I can’t discover the name of it, although while looking — no research study effort is ever truly in vain — I did turn up the (really disturbing) Cotard delusion. (And believing about the reverse, people who believe they’re genuine however turn out to be fictional characters, reminded me of one of my preferred SF stories, “You’re Another.”)
But anyway. Last Tuesday afternoon I came to the realization that I am not (in fact) an actual person, however a character in a William Gibson novel.
I came to this realization while reading Zero History. I was sitting on a plane, en path to a “Big Data” seminar (!), having been suddenly upgraded to very first class (!!), reading the book on my iPad (Apple fetishization — extremely Gibson). I’d downloaded it at the entrance at the last minute, when I discovered available was no wifi on the flight. I was using a new skirt. It was blue digital camouflage, as well as I made it myself. (Gibson sufficient for you yet?)
It was the new skirt that tipped me off to my unreal status. camo as well as the blending of armed forces as well as street fashion is a — I don’t know, not truly a theme, however perhaps a theme — in Zero history as well as there I was, deeply immersed in the book, when I shifted in my seat, glanced down at it, as well as realized that I wasn’t a genuine person, however just a Gibsonesque character.
I mean — really. look at the evidence. Gibson’s characters are post-fashion: they’re defined by being post-fashion. sometimes the plots are driven by the process of finding what it means to be post-fashion as well as post-brands (but never post-style). They’re insanely picky (well, insanely picky compared to people who aren’t Gibson characters) about what they wear. They have self-imposed uniforms; they dislike logos. (I make my own clothes, in part, since I dislike logos.) They’re consumed with specific iconic brands. They scout for long-discontinued products on eBay.
Gibson’s characters have ridiculous jobs. (I likewise have a ridiculous job.)
Gibson’s characters, if not digital natives, are usually digital immigrants, living a kind of twilight existence between the on the internet as well as the off. (How are we interacting right NOW?) Are you sure I’m real? video of me might be faked, these blog posts produced by some tired AI, all kind of traces inserted stochastically deep in those layers of the Web which are quickly turning into digital peat …
You’d believe that I’d be disturbed by this, however I’m truly fine with it (as a Gibson character would be, after the preliminary freakout). I mean, it might be worse: I might be a character in a Dan brown novel, right, or in some book with “Shopaholic” in the title? as well as Gibson’s books do mainly have happy or happy-ish endings, after all.
(Weirdly, my sartorial obsessions began in 1983-4, right around the time Neuromancer was published. That’s when I discovered to sew as well as likewise when I ended up being fixated on cent loafers, at first traditional Bass Weejuns. )
I haven’t completed Zero history yet, however I’m extremely close to the end, as well as there’s not truly time for me to make an appearance before the denouement. perhaps in the next book … I’m truly looking ahead to satisfying Bigend. I hope he’s still using that blue suit.
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